NEW spring craft beer in Denver, 2022 edition. Originally posted on March 15, 2021. Updated on March 15, 2022.
Who are we? Who are you? It doesn’t matter to us. At Satire, you are welcome.
As the unofficial watering hole of adventurers, jokers, hipsters, and goons (plus everything in between), all are encouraged to enjoy our delicious Denver beer, and maybe make a friend or two. While our menu does change a little every day, there are several spring beers we routinely keep on tap. New(ish) spring brews are listed below, plus our spring menu from 2021.
Satire Spring Craft Beer in Denver 2022
Chocherrimon – ABV 7.3%
A cherry chocolate coffee Pokemon stout. A cherry fruit tastebud attack with a subtle chocolate defense and finish. Special defense smooth coffee flavor. Special attack deliciousness that will overwhelm any opponent, even Arceus. Totally kicks Pikachu’s ass. Dominates that little bitch.
Mint Kahludicrous – ABV 7.1%
A decadent mint chocolate coffee Kahlua stout. You may say “that’s ludicrous!”. Close. It’s “Kahludicrous!”
Dilldo – ABV 5%
For your pleasure, we bring you a DILL loaded pickle beer. Good for when you are not in the mood for the same old thing. Award winning: “perhaps the worst beer name in the state” – Westword Magazine.
The Little Easy – ABV 5%
A geaux to light golden French Saison. Brilliant tastes of fresh fruit and white pepper. Can help your situashuuun by relieving frustrashuuun (as pronounced and spelled in the Cajun Dictionary) with lively flavor and drinkability.
Canjun Swamp Swill – ABV 4.9%
Cajun-spiced beer with a lotta zest and heat. It’s a liquid taste of New Orleans cuisine without the smell of late-night Bourbon Street in summer. Spicy enough…it may even relieve constipashuuun (even better than Old Milwaukee)
Cherry on Rum Barrel – ABV 9.86%
Our cherry Belgian ale is aged in a Barbados rum barrel. Tastes of vanilla, oak, cherry, and rum. Special release for George Washington’s birthday. The story is George couldn’t lie about chopping down the cherry tree because he had to tell the truth. Well, the truth is that the story isn’t true. It was made up by a writer to sell more books. Lying about a story with a moral of truth. Hmmm…
Shamus Red – ABV 7.2%
Scottish ale with subtle roasted, honey, and toffee notes. Shamus was William Wallace’s cousin, a giant warrior with long red hair and a full bushy red beard known for slaying hundreds of Englishmen. Just kidding. We made it up.
Soft Scrotum – ABV 9.17%
A gentle barley wine we made lighter than our big barley wine, Old Scrotum, that is aged in a barrel, so it is just Soft Scrotum. Forged with a variety of earthy, woody and floral English hops plus a nice biscuit flavor. No real scrotum involved… this batch.
Satire Spring Craft Beer in Denver 2021
Spring 2021 beers. Incase you want to reminisce.
McLovin’s Red – ABV 5.5%
Casually smokey and roasty with an abundance of maltiness. Based on John McLovin’s historical Irish Red recipe from the 1800s. Or just made up with a funny name from Superbad. It’s hard to just have one.
Nocenco IPA – ABV 5.5%
North Central Colorado-style IPA. And yes, we know it isn’t an ancient civilization in South America. But it does certainly sound like one. Dedicated to the hard-working people of this region. About time we had our own style.
Monkey Snatch – ABV 4.5%
A wild combination of two of our most popular beers. Monkey Spank: a German Hefeweizen with banana and clove notes, and Snatch: our hatch green chile beer. Heat and sweet! And you were thinking some kind of weird monkey porn. Shame on you!
Cherry On – ABV 9.57%
A full-bodied Belgian ale aged on sweet and tart cherries. No popping this cherry, we only serve it on draft. No matter what, Cherry on.
Old Chosky – ABV 11.2%
Not a penis reference or Polish joke but a barrel-aged stout. Strong and bold. Ask your liquid therapist to bring you a report before ordering. Buyer beware.
He’s Easy – 4.2%
Light Amber, soft caramel, and chocolate. All guys aren’t easy, there are few respectable men out there with class…and, they aren’t just ugly.
Bad Girlfriend – ABV 9.17%
A lush apricot Belgian that draws you in like a bad relationship. For those that live recklessly and keep going back when you know you shouldn’t.
Toasted Monkey – ABV 6%
Wheat beer, a mutated version of our popular German Hefeweizen, Monkey Spank. Scintillating taste. Banana, clove, and toasted wheat. Get your thrills without a spank today.
Mint Kahkudicrous – ABV 7.8%
Rich, smooth stout made with secret Kahlua base recipe from a friend of Satire. Chocolate, coffee, mint, and vanilla. It’s ludicrously delicious. May turn you into a Kahluaholic.
Don’t forget our kitchen, The Loaded Squirrel, serves up delicious sharable plates all day long. Perfect for splitting with new friends. Ask about our Sunday Brunch options. We’ve got bacon, we’ve got eggs, and we’ve got gravy. You can’t go wrong with a cinnamon roll and a stout on a Sunday afternoon.
Visit Satire for these delicious beers, snacks, and much more. Open Tuesday through Sunday in Thornton, CO. Join us TODAY for some much-needed fun.